Spending More Time in the Sand Than David Hasselhoff

When I was younger, I used to like watching the early season celebrity pro-ams – the Hope, the “Clambake” at Pebble Beach. It was fun for me to watch the nice weather and see some famous people hack around with the pros while I was sitting in the midst of winter in the wonderland known as Wisconsin.

As I get older, I like them less and less.

First off, I don’t live in the frozen tundra anymore so the early PGA season isn’t a preview of spring like it used to be. I don’t drool looking at the overseeded fairways in Tucson or the Pacific Ocean off the Monterey Peninsula. Maybe I’m maturing . . . [insert punchline here].

Second, I just don’t like watching B and C List celebs swinging the stick with pros who are trying to do their jobs. I like Ray Romano just fine, but I’d rather not see him chop it out from a fairway bunker with JB Holmes watching. Same for Kevin James. And I certainly don’t want to see some corporate CEO who is a member at Pine Valley and sandbags to a handicap of 18 while looking all the world like a 2 cheat on national TV either.

But the thing that has come to bother me the most is the way that the Hope courses are destroyed by the pros. Remember Duval’s 59? It was at the Hope. Every year, the 5 rounds of the Hope give up more birdies than the Badgers gave up passing yards this year. It is ridiculous. And this year is even crazier. Pat Perez set a consecutive round PGA tour record for low score in the first two rounds. This was such an incredible standard and worthy record that it was broken the next two days by Steve Stricker’s 61 and 62. That’s 123 strokes for 36 holes. To break it down even further, Stevo had 21 birdies, 15 pars, and nothing else except an uncontrollable case of the giggles during those two days. 6 more birdies than pars! 33 under par after four rounds? Are you kidding me?

Maybe it is because I can’t make birdies like that in any situation, even in those courses with windmills and clown mouths. I can’t appreciate 11 birdies in one round because it is beyond my mind’s ability to comprehend, much like the path our Secretary of State took to her current position.

I love professional golf. And I am a huge fan of Stricker’s, so it isn’t that I’m upset Steve did this. Someone would have, so it might as well have been the fellow Cheesehead. But I would much rather see these guys challenged. I like tournaments where birdie is not that easy and bogey is a definite possiblity on most holes. I want to see them work a bit – make the spectacular shot to save par, not the boring play for birdie. The US Open is the classic example, but the Player’s and the Wachovia in Charlotte are good ones too. This is one of the reasons I never got too excited about my hometown tournament, the Greater Milwaukee Open (now, the US Bank Open, at least this week). Brown Deer is a very good course, but pros just kill it.

Bottom line: As I get older, I just don’t want the game to look that easy for anyone.

The only good thing about today’s round: no celebs.

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I ran into Jay Busbee’s interview with David Feherty online today and I just had to share some of it.

For those who don’t know, Feherty is a former European tour player from Ireland who retired in 1997 and since, has been the best on-course announcer in golf history for my money. He has a way with words that, well, no one else has. For example, he has used the phrase “pulled up on the back of his underwear violently” in describing how a certain PGA player felt after flubbing a shot. Another favorite: “that ball ran across the green like a frozen sloat” – I think that means the green was slick.

But, as this interview shows, he isn’t just funny, but a man who may care about America more than most Americans.

Some excerpts:

His view on the war in Iraq: “What you think of the war — whether we should be there, whether we shouldn’t — isn’t truly relevant anymore. This is one of the greatest good deeds the world has ever seen. Iraq had the fourth largest army in the world, and we blew right through it. And now you’ve got Iran pushing in, looking to gain control. It’s truly terrifying — we think in four-year election cycles, and these people think in hundreds of years.”

On how great it is to live in the US: “I’ve lived so many other places, and it’s given me some perspective. The average American wouldn’t believe how extraordinary we have it here. Every day I wake up, I think, “Am I still in America? Yes? Thank f—!”"

And some of the funny stuff.

Speaking about a golf tour he did in Iraq for the American troops where a long drive champ hit a ball off a rubber tee in Feherty’s button fly, “When you’ve got a club coming 200mph right at your plums, that’ll wake you up.”

On how amazing Tiger was compared to the players Feherty was used to on the tour when he hit the scene: “And then every round, Tiger would hit a couple shots, and I’d say, “F—, I didn’t see that one coming.”"

Another reference to how unique the Striped One is: “You just can’t say enough about the guy. He’s winning majors by 10, 12, 15 shots. We haven’t seen that kind of stuff since the 1800s, when Old Tom Morris was playing with a badger’s testicle stuffed with seagull feathers.”

Badger’s testicle stuffed with seagull feathers? How does he even imagine this stuff?

And finally, how’s this for an attitude about life after nearly dying in a bicycle accident last year: “But still, man, I’m a lucky guy. Can’t wait to see what’s going to be next.”?

The world needs more Fehertys.

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Local guys doing well at the Sony in Hawaii!!

Webb Simpson was at the top of the leaderboard all day yesterday with an early 66 (4 under). Webb is a Raleigh product, graduate of Broughton and Wake Forest. He made it to the tour this year through a great performance (tied for 7th)  at Q school.

David Mathis was 2 under after Round 1 yesterday and is doing well so far today (4 under all day). He is a Campbell grad (Go Camels!) in 1997 and has been around the Raleigh area for quite some time. This is his first year on tour after being on the lower tours for quite some time. He made it by having a great year last year on the Nationwide tour. On a semi-personal note, he actually helped coach my older son’s high school team a few years back.

Brendon Todd from Green Hope HS and the University of Georgia was 1 under yesterday and even for the tournament after finishing early today. He is a Nationwide Tour grad from last year, like David.

Good to see the local crowd doing well in the Big Show.

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The European Tour has commenced it’s new money list. Formerly, and somewhat classily, called the “Order of Merit”, the ET has changed the listing to “The Race for Dubai.” Gosh, KJE, why would they do that, you query?

Because $140 million speaks loudly.

The top 60 wage earners on the Euro tour will be eligible for the final tournament of the year at the Jumeirah Golf Estates with a $10 million purse, on either the Earth or Fire courses (hey, what about Wind?). At the close of this tourney, the top 15 earners will split another pool of $10 million bucks, with $2 mil to the winner, 1.5 to the place, 1.0 to show and so on down to $250,000 for 15th place.

How do they afford it, in this modern world of financial earthquakes? Why, the Dubai-based Leisurecorp Group, funding the tour for $140 million over the next 5 years. Who is your daddy, Euro Tour Exec Director George O’Grady?

Now, that is great for the European Tour. It helps them compete with the PGA Tour’s FedEx Cup and, my guess is, it will be better done. It already seems so much more intuitive and easier to understand than the FedEx. And I love the European Tour. It is interesting, with places as varied as Shanghai, Melbourne, Australia; Johannesburg SA, Qatar, india, and some of those other great European venues on the docket. I like the Golf Channel’s announcers (they sound so much smarter than me, with their accents and all, ya know?) and the productions are very well done.

Here’s my issue with the whole thing. American PGA Members are jumping. Not Tiger Woods, due to his recent surgery you might have heard of, but many others. Phil Mickelson, Anthony Kim, and Camillo Villegas made their European Tour debuts in Shanghai last weekend. And others are sure to come, since the 4 majors and the 3 World Golf Championships already count toward the 12 required Tour events. So PGA Tour players, at least the top level ones, need only add 5 other tournaments to their schedules to qualify. Tiger played 10 events that would qualify in 2006 and 9 in 2007, without really trying. If they do well, they’ll finish in the top 60 and get a shot at more money.

But aren’t they over-scheduled already? I keep hearing about how tired Phil gets after the PGA and that it is so hard for him to keep focused for the playoff run, the Ryder Cup, etc. etc. etc. He always seems to need to spend more quality time with his kids and his lovely wife. I’m good with that, but, unfortunately,  the extra few tournaments he’ll need to get in the Euro tour will come out of American events that rely on his glamour and prestige to add to their cred – because he won’t play more tournaments, only different ones. Which ones will he cut out – who knows? But every American tournament that had Phil in it last year is worried this year. Same for the other players who will try to grab on to the Dubai cash go-round. Do you think tournaments don’t want Anthony Kim or Camillo to play in America this year? I don’t think so.

Why do they do it? Let us make some guesses:

• Prestige
• The valor of returning glory to a classic tour
• The love of the game

Come on, folks, we know better. Let’s say it as one – “Show me the money.”

Cold Hard Cash Facts: Phil made $47 million in endorsement money last year, more than even Lebron, Kobe, and Payton Manning (who seems to be universal). Sports Illustrated put the number at $53 million for endorsements and $62 million total. What is an extra $2 million to him, even if we assume he will win the Race to Dubai? Enough to change around his schedule and create problems on his home tour, significant ones for a few tournaments, I’m afraid.

And he is just one of more than a few to come.

That is sad, sad, sad.

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It seems like Halloween was just last week.

And I hardly remember Thanksgiving – or Christmas for that matter.

But 2009 is here! At least it is according to the European PGA Tour. Yup, their 2009 season is underway in Shanghai with the HSBC Champions event. And it culminates a mere 13 months later in China at the Omega Mission Hills tournament in China.

To clarify – 2009 has started, although it is the first full weekend of November, 2008. And the 2009 season will last 13 months.

Does this have anything to do with the conversion of Euros to dollars? Or Greenwich mean time to Eastern Standard?

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Seve with a brain tumor has generated a tremendous amount of press. Actually, a surprising amount to me. I think I might be shocked at the coverage in Europe, though.

I’ve never been a huge Seve fan. He always seemed a bit, well, haughty. Maybe stand-offish is a better description. Others might say regal or noble, but he never struck me as a particularly likable man during his heyday. And he just seemed to love kicking the US’s butt in the Ryder Cup.

But he is huge in Europe. According to an interview with the former president of the European Tour, every sports broadcast and most general newscasts opened with the news that Seve had a tumor. He compared Seve’s hold on Euros, especially Spaniards, to Arnie’s hold on Americans. It has to be on playing style, I guess, because I don’t think anyone would describe Arnie as remotely standoffish or regal, in spite of his “King” nickname. They both were the swashbuckler, risk-taker types in their active playing careers. Never knew what was going to happen at any time but it would probably be interesting. They were also admired by scores of younger pros, who idolized both Arnie and Seve as they started their pro careers.

My thoughts are with him, now, though. I guess I feel more empathy now that he is sick than I did when he was playing. Mainly because health problems make everyone seem more human, less “haughty”, more deserving of sympathy.

Why does it take an illness to change my judgmental nature?

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As I’m sure most of us will hear around town, on line, and on TV this next few days, “we” won the Ryder Cup. You know, me, Jimmy, Phil and the guys. We.

Riiiiiiight.

It is one of my many pet peeves: when fans use the proverbial “we” in talking of a team’s victory. I love the Packers but “we” won’t be playing the dreaded Cowboys tonight – they will. You know, the Packers. The professionals. Some might say the collection of mercenaries who represents the Green Bay community. They aren’t my teammates, my friends – not even my acquaintances. They are the people who wear the uniform of the team I’ve grown attached to over 4 decades of fandom and Wisconsin living. I am no more a part of their lives and circles of influence than I am for the elite of the elite pro golfers who played in Louisville this week. That has no bearing on how frustrated I’ll get when Tony Romo throws 6 touchdowns to TO tonight, though.

Likewise, “we” did not win the Ryder Cup. The American team did. And my congratulations to them. It was fun to watch and good to see an “underdog” win, just like most Americans like to see. But I didn’t play a role. Neither did you – unless Steve Stricker has heard my compliments about him that came from this blog and has been checking in regularly. Then, Stevie, you won the Ryder Cup, but me and the rest of the misfits who read this did not.

I like the American team and I rooted for them this weekend. But I also like the Euros. Lee Westwood is a stand up guy and great golfer who came from oblivion a few years ago to rework his game and become a dominant force on the Tour. Sergio, whatever his other faults, brings an enthusiasm to golf, and the Ryder Cup specifically, that is tremendous. Miguel Angel Jimenez is great – he reminds me that overweight 40-somethings can still play great golf. I tuned in not to cheer for “my” team but to see great golf. And I saw a lot of it.

America won the Ryder Cup. Paul Azinger and his men won it. Anthony Kim and Boo won it. But “we” didn’t.

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I’ve succeeded in avoiding hearing any news about the Ryder Cup all day today – through work, a quick visit to the golf course, and now sitting in Caribou Coffee sipping a mocha waiting for my son to call to pick him up. Can I hold off until I get home to watch today’s recorded matches? Can I fast forward through enough commercial breaks and fluff to see the whole 10 hours of coverage before sleep overtakes me?

No and No.

But I still like the suspense of not knowing.

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It’s started – Ryder Cup Fevah!

Someone thinks that because Sergio and Padraig Harrington can’t stand each other that the US will win.

Some think that since the US of A has two native Kentuckians who, gasp, are going to possibly, maybe play together in a match (Kenny Perry and JB Holmes), that the crowd will be in such a frenzy for their fellas, they will spur the US to victory.

Some (Tim Rosaforte from Golf World and The Golf Channel) feel that this is the Ryder Cup of Lefty – Mickelson, sans El Tigre, has the opportunity to become the leader that Colin Montgomery has been for the Euros.

Settle down, folks. The Ryder Cup will come down to putting. The US hasn’t hit the broad side of a barn in almost a decade (since Justin Leonard’s bomb that led to the stampede in 1999). The Euros hit everything, under pressure and, well, over pressure – if that’s the opposite.

Specifically:

Sergio and Paddy have never liked each other but they still play well in the RC and kick the US upside the head every other year.

JB and Kenny, though good players, haven’t had high pressure situations like this before. And I haven’t seen the crowd come out and hit a 5 foot downhill slider for a match tie in foursomes yet.

And, Mr. Rosaforte, Philly has been uninspiring in the Cup in his career, in spite of his many attempts at it. He’s probably best known for infuriating Tiger in their alternate shot match together (I can still picture the Striped One with a stone face, fuming about his next shot while standing next to the fence that Phil’s drive landed by). Oh, and changing clubs immediately before that same Ryder Cup.

So watch the putting green, kids. That’s where the next champ will rise to the top. And that’s one reason I love Steve Stricker as a Captain’s pick.

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