The Bob Hope Birdie-Palooza
When I was younger, I used to like watching the early season celebrity pro-ams – the Hope, the “Clambake” at Pebble Beach. It was fun for me to watch the nice weather and see some famous people hack around with the pros while I was sitting in the midst of winter in the wonderland known as Wisconsin.
As I get older, I like them less and less.
First off, I don’t live in the frozen tundra anymore so the early PGA season isn’t a preview of spring like it used to be. I don’t drool looking at the overseeded fairways in Tucson or the Pacific Ocean off the Monterey Peninsula. Maybe I’m maturing . . . [insert punchline here].
Second, I just don’t like watching B and C List celebs swinging the stick with pros who are trying to do their jobs. I like Ray Romano just fine, but I’d rather not see him chop it out from a fairway bunker with JB Holmes watching. Same for Kevin James. And I certainly don’t want to see some corporate CEO who is a member at Pine Valley and sandbags to a handicap of 18 while looking all the world like a 2 cheat on national TV either.
But the thing that has come to bother me the most is the way that the Hope courses are destroyed by the pros. Remember Duval’s 59? It was at the Hope. Every year, the 5 rounds of the Hope give up more birdies than the Badgers gave up passing yards this year. It is ridiculous. And this year is even crazier. Pat Perez set a consecutive round PGA tour record for low score in the first two rounds. This was such an incredible standard and worthy record that it was broken the next two days by Steve Stricker’s 61 and 62. That’s 123 strokes for 36 holes. To break it down even further, Stevo had 21 birdies, 15 pars, and nothing else except an uncontrollable case of the giggles during those two days. 6 more birdies than pars! 33 under par after four rounds? Are you kidding me?
Maybe it is because I can’t make birdies like that in any situation, even in those courses with windmills and clown mouths. I can’t appreciate 11 birdies in one round because it is beyond my mind’s ability to comprehend, much like the path our Secretary of State took to her current position.
I love professional golf. And I am a huge fan of Stricker’s, so it isn’t that I’m upset Steve did this. Someone would have, so it might as well have been the fellow Cheesehead. But I would much rather see these guys challenged. I like tournaments where birdie is not that easy and bogey is a definite possiblity on most holes. I want to see them work a bit – make the spectacular shot to save par, not the boring play for birdie. The US Open is the classic example, but the Player’s and the Wachovia in Charlotte are good ones too. This is one of the reasons I never got too excited about my hometown tournament, the Greater Milwaukee Open (now, the US Bank Open, at least this week). Brown Deer is a very good course, but pros just kill it.
Bottom line: As I get older, I just don’t want the game to look that easy for anyone.
The only good thing about today’s round: no celebs.
